We turned off the TV and got ready for bed. As we snuggled together, my husband's body suddenly jerked and he screamed. At first I thought he was having a leg cramp, but within seconds it happened again. His body jerked upwards as if some unknown person was lifting him up off the bed and throwing him down again. He cried out and grabbed his chest. I asked him if it was his heart and he said yes and again his body was jerked upwards and slammed back down again. I grabbed the phone and called 911. The operator answered after two rings but it felt like an eternity. I told her my husband is having a heart attack and to please send an ambulance. She asked if he was breathing and he again was jerked upwards crying out in pain.
Three years ago, the love of my life suffered a heart attack and a defibrillator and a pacemaker. The defibrillator monitors his heart rate and when it is beating too slow or too fast sends a electric shock to his heart muscle to try to shock it back to normal. It will continue until his heart is beating at a normal rate. The jerking I was heartbreakingly witnessing was 30 jules of power being sent to his heart trying to get it to stop beating so fast.
Still talking to the operator, I frantically helped my husband put some shorts on and then put some clothes on myself. I found I was crying and begging the operator to please hurry and send the ambulance. I raced to the door and unlocked it turning on the porch light. My husband was still in so much pain. He said it was like being kicked in the chest by a mule.
Finally I saw red lights and ran to the door and let the EMT's in the house.
They witnessed another shock and quickly started working on him.
I found myself praying and pleading with them to save my husband. What kind of cruel joke would take the man I loved so much from me. I bargained with God, to take me and let him live. I had cancer God, so take me instead I cried. A fireman asked me what medicines my husband was taking, and I ran to get the list. They had him on the stretcher and said they were taking him to our local hospital. They said for me to meet them there. My husband, pulled the oxygen off his mouth and started to tell me where the hospital was. I have lived less than a year in this town and had no idea.
The rescue squad placed the mask back on my love and told me what street the hospital was on. I grabbed my phone, purse and keys got in my car. As I was driving I called my step daughters who live 3 hours away and told them about their father. I told them to stand by before starting the journey here because I did not know how severe this was. I called my daughters who live a hour and a half away. My oldest daughter told me to try to hold it together. I was crying so hard. She said my husband needed me and I had to be strong. How does one stay strong when the love of her life was slipping away?
I pulled into the hospital parking lot and tried to follow the signs to the Emergency room. I felt lost and took a wrong turn but ended up pulling in as the ambulance was arriving. I ran to the ambulance and looked through the window. My husbands eyes had rolled back into his head. I watched as they cut away his shirt and put paddles on his chest. They shocked his heart and his body convulsed. The EMT's started to roll the gurney out of the ambulance and I tried to follow them. They sent me to waiting room. I did not know if my husband was alive or dead. I was alone and pleading with the receptionist to let me go in. She took down his information and said I would be allowed in when and if he was stable. That phrase was the scariest thing I ever heard. I sat down on the chair, wishing I had someone to call to come to the hospital with me. Sadly I had not made any friends locally that I could call and family was so far away.
The EMT came out and said my husband's heart had entered a lethal rhythm and they were trying to stabilize him...
I did not know if my husband was dead or alive...again I began to pray and bargain with God....My husband was floating between heaven and earth.
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